SeanPresleyWrites
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With pen in hand and feet on flooding ground,
I'm always looking up,
hoping that laughter is that sound.
About? About?! What am I all about?
That's for a psychiatrist to figure out and I can't afford one so... I'll just tell you what I write about.What do I write?
I write the songs that...make the whole world sing. I write the songs of love and spe--ecial thee--ings - oh wait man, that's low. That was Manilow. I just write the songs that are on this website, and more.
I write the poems that... make me a dork, but they are straight from my heart. Well, a few are from my butt, but that's another story... that can probably be found on this website.
I write the... short books that help cancer patients escape into me, and help laughter escape the throat.
I write the... comedy routines that are unfit for this classy AF website.
My debut novel is complete. It's 98,000 words of comedy-drama that will make you laugh until your rectum bleeds.
My second novel is for Middle Grade kids, the 28,000 word journey is a quirky fun romp.
My essays, poems and short books about colon cancer come from my severely personal experiences, so you better believe there's some righteous shit on those pages.
I've penned seven short stories, and at least three don't suck.
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Basically I'm just a freakin' guy who writes a lot. I'm up-chucking it out there, here, just in case anybody, anywhere, wants to read what the voices in my head have driven me to scribble and type, scribble and type, scribble and type, oh-dear-Jack Nicholson in the Shining, have I been scribbling and typing. Read me or not, don't worry, I promise I won't be coming at your door with an ax, announcing, "Heeere's, Seany!" I'm just a freakin' raconteur, leaving the house with tools is not on the agenda.
This just in! Herman Melville rolled over in his grave a moment ago and tapped me on the shoulder. He sawed off this word and insisted I define it. Hack: A writer or journalist who produces low-quality articles or books. Hmm-hey! I see what Hermy did there. Doh! At least I can still try, Herm! You've been dead longer than 1 1/3 William Shatner, beeotch! Sorry, sometimes I harp and lampoon when I'm a mopey dick.
Note: Any grammatical errorrs or typos of any kind encountered on this site were intentional. I'll explain why later, but first, this quote to ponder by the philosopher, Troo Dat; "A reader's focus should be on the point and soul of a busy author's work, so worry not about perfect editing, you jerk."
ATTENTION AGENTS:If you're an agent looking to represent, please put your hand in my front pocket and search for the keys, my vehicle is available for joy rides on your platform! Warning: If my writing causes a rejection that lasts for more than four hours... call a doctor immediately and ask if they like my work.
That's for a psychiatrist to figure out and I can't afford one so... I'll just tell you what I write about.What do I write?
I write the songs that...make the whole world sing. I write the songs of love and spe--ecial thee--ings - oh wait man, that's low. That was Manilow. I just write the songs that are on this website, and more.
I write the poems that... make me a dork, but they are straight from my heart. Well, a few are from my butt, but that's another story... that can probably be found on this website.
I write the... short books that help cancer patients escape into me, and help laughter escape the throat.
I write the... comedy routines that are unfit for this classy AF website.
My debut novel is complete. It's 98,000 words of comedy-drama that will make you laugh until your rectum bleeds.
My second novel is for Middle Grade kids, the 28,000 word journey is a quirky fun romp.
My essays, poems and short books about colon cancer come from my severely personal experiences, so you better believe there's some righteous shit on those pages.
I've penned seven short stories, and at least three don't suck.
/////////////////
Basically I'm just a freakin' guy who writes a lot. I'm up-chucking it out there, here, just in case anybody, anywhere, wants to read what the voices in my head have driven me to scribble and type, scribble and type, scribble and type, oh-dear-Jack Nicholson in the Shining, have I been scribbling and typing. Read me or not, don't worry, I promise I won't be coming at your door with an ax, announcing, "Heeere's, Seany!" I'm just a freakin' raconteur, leaving the house with tools is not on the agenda.
This just in! Herman Melville rolled over in his grave a moment ago and tapped me on the shoulder. He sawed off this word and insisted I define it. Hack: A writer or journalist who produces low-quality articles or books. Hmm-hey! I see what Hermy did there. Doh! At least I can still try, Herm! You've been dead longer than 1 1/3 William Shatner, beeotch! Sorry, sometimes I harp and lampoon when I'm a mopey dick.
Note: Any grammatical errorrs or typos of any kind encountered on this site were intentional. I'll explain why later, but first, this quote to ponder by the philosopher, Troo Dat; "A reader's focus should be on the point and soul of a busy author's work, so worry not about perfect editing, you jerk."
ATTENTION AGENTS:If you're an agent looking to represent, please put your hand in my front pocket and search for the keys, my vehicle is available for joy rides on your platform! Warning: If my writing causes a rejection that lasts for more than four hours... call a doctor immediately and ask if they like my work.
Contact Sean by Email at: sean@seanpresleywrites.com © Copyright 2017 Sean Presley - All Rights Reserved
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