Embedded Files
Written for the enjoyment of children with cancer.
NED LANCER #1
This is the story of everyone's friend, His name is Ned Lancer, Yes it’s true, he's just like you, Ned also has cancer. Mr. Lancer is a tall thin bald guy, With a little bitty beard and a twinkle in his eyes, But sometimes, when he forgets to try, cancer makes him sadly sigh,
Of course, he'd much rather laugh and play, So he has no time to sigh or cry; why waste a beautiful day? You know, the funny thing about ol’ Ned, is not the twinkle in his eyes, The funny thing is, he mostly wears white tee-shirts and he always wears colorful ties,
On Monday he wears green ties and changes them twice a day, On Tuesday he wears purple ties, with polka-dots of red or gray, On Wednesdays he wears yellow ties that look like ripe bananas, but he mostly sleeps all day, In a big soft pile of yellow hay,
I'll take a break here, in the middle of the week, You know, I'm thinking to myself, if I could hear some of you children speak, You'd be all like, “Hey story teller dude! How can Mr. Lancer wear a tie without a suit?” That's a good question, But, if you knew he mostly wears orange boots, Maybe you'd agree that white tee shirts and blue pants, With his colorful ties, are probably better than suits.
Anyhow, on Fridays, which are Ned's favorite tie days, He wears a rainbow tie, with all the colors in the sky, Uh oh, I forgot about Thursday, well, the tie is surely always pink, He calls Thursday – ties for her, days, with a wink.
That's all for now about silly Ned, He's Mr. Lancer, and he's just like you, He has cancer and he worries too, But mostly he worries because his pants are blue, And none of his ties really match, Whatever will he do?
Ned says to say; “Try to forget about cancer and have some serious fun”, Just because you and Ned have cancer, doesn't mean that fun is on the run, In fact, when it comes to having fun, you and Ned can be number one.
This is the story of everyone's friend, His name is Ned Lancer, Yes it’s true, he's just like you, Ned also has cancer. Mr. Lancer is a tall thin bald guy, With a little bitty beard and a twinkle in his eyes, But sometimes, when he forgets to try, cancer makes him sadly sigh,
Of course, he'd much rather laugh and play, So he has no time to sigh or cry; why waste a beautiful day? You know, the funny thing about ol’ Ned, is not the twinkle in his eyes, The funny thing is, he mostly wears white tee-shirts and he always wears colorful ties,
On Monday he wears green ties and changes them twice a day, On Tuesday he wears purple ties, with polka-dots of red or gray, On Wednesdays he wears yellow ties that look like ripe bananas, but he mostly sleeps all day, In a big soft pile of yellow hay,
I'll take a break here, in the middle of the week, You know, I'm thinking to myself, if I could hear some of you children speak, You'd be all like, “Hey story teller dude! How can Mr. Lancer wear a tie without a suit?” That's a good question, But, if you knew he mostly wears orange boots, Maybe you'd agree that white tee shirts and blue pants, With his colorful ties, are probably better than suits.
Anyhow, on Fridays, which are Ned's favorite tie days, He wears a rainbow tie, with all the colors in the sky, Uh oh, I forgot about Thursday, well, the tie is surely always pink, He calls Thursday – ties for her, days, with a wink.
That's all for now about silly Ned, He's Mr. Lancer, and he's just like you, He has cancer and he worries too, But mostly he worries because his pants are blue, And none of his ties really match, Whatever will he do?
Ned says to say; “Try to forget about cancer and have some serious fun”, Just because you and Ned have cancer, doesn't mean that fun is on the run, In fact, when it comes to having fun, you and Ned can be number one.
NED LANCER #2
Tall and thin Ned Lancer is lounging on his big round bed,He has cancer, at least that's what everybody says. “Big deal”, says Ned, and then he smiles,
He’s playing with his kitty cat named Crocodile,And his tiny turtle, Big Red.He wonders if you're having any serious fun today,Because Ned is all about fun, hooray!
Ned knows that no matter how short or tall you grow, maybe six feet two,Something is probably going to make you sick,Like when you lick a dirty brown brick, or eat grandma Greeny's liver stew,So his attitude remains sunny and his skies are always blue,
This day is a Friday, Ned's favorite tie day,With his rainbow tie so colorful,He helps to fill the arms of his mother full--of the crabs that he's found by the beach,Ned can't wait to laugh, but at first his mother doesn't screech,
His mom thought the crabs were orange flowers at first,But when she saw crabs falling like water from a shower, she burst,Into what was supposed to be a scream,But her throat was dry, from an awful thirst,So, by falling crabs she was creamed,And Ned laughed like a hyena in an African clown’s dream,
Nobody ever sees Ned on Saturdays,Oh, his friends tried to spy on him, with climbing and ladder ways,To see if they can sneak a peek and see the color of his tie,Maybe colors from Alice and Wonderland, from the Mad Hatter days,But for Ned, Saturdays are always unseen 'no matter days',So he wears baseball colors from his baseball batter days,
Good ol’ Ned loves ties that pleased the girl’s eyes too,So on Sundays he dresses in the fun ways that girl’s want him to,Some Sunday ties have Winnie the Pooh,Other ties have real cool stripes, like tigers at the zoo,
That's all for now about our friend Ned, who has cancer,That's all for now about ol' Ned Lancer,Until next time, he says to say; “Having fun is an answer too”,But, when he said to say it, he was dancing like a mad baboon,So he spilled his orange spaghetti on his long thin pants of blue.
Tall and thin Ned Lancer is lounging on his big round bed,He has cancer, at least that's what everybody says. “Big deal”, says Ned, and then he smiles,
He’s playing with his kitty cat named Crocodile,And his tiny turtle, Big Red.He wonders if you're having any serious fun today,Because Ned is all about fun, hooray!
Ned knows that no matter how short or tall you grow, maybe six feet two,Something is probably going to make you sick,Like when you lick a dirty brown brick, or eat grandma Greeny's liver stew,So his attitude remains sunny and his skies are always blue,
This day is a Friday, Ned's favorite tie day,With his rainbow tie so colorful,He helps to fill the arms of his mother full--of the crabs that he's found by the beach,Ned can't wait to laugh, but at first his mother doesn't screech,
His mom thought the crabs were orange flowers at first,But when she saw crabs falling like water from a shower, she burst,Into what was supposed to be a scream,But her throat was dry, from an awful thirst,So, by falling crabs she was creamed,And Ned laughed like a hyena in an African clown’s dream,
Nobody ever sees Ned on Saturdays,Oh, his friends tried to spy on him, with climbing and ladder ways,To see if they can sneak a peek and see the color of his tie,Maybe colors from Alice and Wonderland, from the Mad Hatter days,But for Ned, Saturdays are always unseen 'no matter days',So he wears baseball colors from his baseball batter days,
Good ol’ Ned loves ties that pleased the girl’s eyes too,So on Sundays he dresses in the fun ways that girl’s want him to,Some Sunday ties have Winnie the Pooh,Other ties have real cool stripes, like tigers at the zoo,
That's all for now about our friend Ned, who has cancer,That's all for now about ol' Ned Lancer,Until next time, he says to say; “Having fun is an answer too”,But, when he said to say it, he was dancing like a mad baboon,So he spilled his orange spaghetti on his long thin pants of blue.
NED LANCER #3
There goes ol' Ned Lancer again,He's on his way home,He's riding his silver bike named Ben, while writing a funny poem,With a magenta colored pen,His poem is about having fun and finding out facts and answers,Like, a female chicken is called a hen,And ballerinas are nimble dancers,
He peddles happily along, but the poem is looking all scribble-y, Because his front wheel is always wobbly and wibbly, Not to mention that, writing a poem while riding a bike,Is pretty hard to do, but Ned is good at doing what he likes,
Magenta is sort of a dark red color,And it’s smearing on his blue pants,He’s going to be in trouble with his mother, And laughed at by his brother,But Ned doesn't even care,He’s always having fun with something or other,
Oh sure, Ned Lancer has cancer,But even when he can't ride his bike,Or his little tyke nephew Mike's trike,He does a dance or two, or sings into a mike,Whatever he chooses to do, it’s always something that he likes,
Of course, sometimes, simply playing just isn't quite enough,Sometimes he has to do the “get well” stuff,Like getting shots, or taking pills,But he wants to do that stuff, because he knows those things will help his ills,So he smiles through the hospital stuff, so he can get back to his thrills,Like chasing butterflies by Miss Pritty's house, up on the bunny hop hills,
Oh my, I forgot to introduce Miss Pritty,She always wears a pretty dress,And I must confess, Ned thinks Miss Pritty,Is very, very, pretty, even though her hair is always a mess,So Ned often rides his bike in front of her house, standing on his head,Hoping pretty Miss Pritty is watching and outstandingly impressed,
It's time again friends, for our friend Ned to say good-bye,With his multi-colored ties and the twinkle in his eyes,Today he says to say, “Have fun and eat lots of pies,Be good and be nice, and never ever tell any lies.”
There goes ol' Ned Lancer again,He's on his way home,He's riding his silver bike named Ben, while writing a funny poem,With a magenta colored pen,His poem is about having fun and finding out facts and answers,Like, a female chicken is called a hen,And ballerinas are nimble dancers,
He peddles happily along, but the poem is looking all scribble-y, Because his front wheel is always wobbly and wibbly, Not to mention that, writing a poem while riding a bike,Is pretty hard to do, but Ned is good at doing what he likes,
Magenta is sort of a dark red color,And it’s smearing on his blue pants,He’s going to be in trouble with his mother, And laughed at by his brother,But Ned doesn't even care,He’s always having fun with something or other,
Oh sure, Ned Lancer has cancer,But even when he can't ride his bike,Or his little tyke nephew Mike's trike,He does a dance or two, or sings into a mike,Whatever he chooses to do, it’s always something that he likes,
Of course, sometimes, simply playing just isn't quite enough,Sometimes he has to do the “get well” stuff,Like getting shots, or taking pills,But he wants to do that stuff, because he knows those things will help his ills,So he smiles through the hospital stuff, so he can get back to his thrills,Like chasing butterflies by Miss Pritty's house, up on the bunny hop hills,
Oh my, I forgot to introduce Miss Pritty,She always wears a pretty dress,And I must confess, Ned thinks Miss Pritty,Is very, very, pretty, even though her hair is always a mess,So Ned often rides his bike in front of her house, standing on his head,Hoping pretty Miss Pritty is watching and outstandingly impressed,
It's time again friends, for our friend Ned to say good-bye,With his multi-colored ties and the twinkle in his eyes,Today he says to say, “Have fun and eat lots of pies,Be good and be nice, and never ever tell any lies.”
NED LANCER #4
Today, your good friend Ned lancer,The one who shares your cancer,Is out finding shells down by the beach,The first shell he found looked like a half-eaten peach,He thought it so funny, he laughed 'till the seagulls screeched,
You know ol’ Ned; he passes up the normal shells, and looks for the weird,He stuck three of the smallest shells in his itty-bitty beard,He chased the waves when the tide went out,Then searched when the sands had cleared,
Then, he sat on his sand castle and wondered,If you've been eating any pies, or telling any lies, You see, tall thin Ned Lancer is not much of a dancer,But he’s always thinking about you kids, who have cancer,
And when he thinks of you and how brave you are,He smiles and eats lots of candy bars,He smiles and plays games with his racing cars,He smiles and tries to always be with you,Through the amazing and crazy things he'll do,
Crazy things like what, you say?You mean besides Wednesdays, when all he does is sleep all day?And he wears orange boots every single day, that's really pretty crazy eh?Oh, and how about when he climbs trees and like’s to shout,“I'm the world's tallest flying pig”, and then he grunts like he has a snout,That's why we all love Ned, especially when he's out and about,He loves to have fun and laugh, of that, we have no doubt,
You can tell today is a Monday, not because it’s a fun day,Which it always is for Ned, who is now eating a hot-fudge Sunday,You can tell it’s a Monday, because his tie is green,This Monday's tie has a bright and shiny sheen,Which the hot fudge is dripping on,He just saw it and yelled, “Hey!”Then he laughed and smeared it all around,Until his green tie looked like the face of a funny clown,
This made Ned laugh, and he’s jumping all around,Oops, he tripped over his sand castle and fell on the ground,Now his green tie is all covered in brown,Oh well, thought Ned, who rolled over and took a nap on the sandy mound,When he woke up, he said to say, “Be happy, and have a very nice day”,And also, “By the way, don't just sit there--have fun and play!”
Today, your good friend Ned lancer,The one who shares your cancer,Is out finding shells down by the beach,The first shell he found looked like a half-eaten peach,He thought it so funny, he laughed 'till the seagulls screeched,
You know ol’ Ned; he passes up the normal shells, and looks for the weird,He stuck three of the smallest shells in his itty-bitty beard,He chased the waves when the tide went out,Then searched when the sands had cleared,
Then, he sat on his sand castle and wondered,If you've been eating any pies, or telling any lies, You see, tall thin Ned Lancer is not much of a dancer,But he’s always thinking about you kids, who have cancer,
And when he thinks of you and how brave you are,He smiles and eats lots of candy bars,He smiles and plays games with his racing cars,He smiles and tries to always be with you,Through the amazing and crazy things he'll do,
Crazy things like what, you say?You mean besides Wednesdays, when all he does is sleep all day?And he wears orange boots every single day, that's really pretty crazy eh?Oh, and how about when he climbs trees and like’s to shout,“I'm the world's tallest flying pig”, and then he grunts like he has a snout,That's why we all love Ned, especially when he's out and about,He loves to have fun and laugh, of that, we have no doubt,
You can tell today is a Monday, not because it’s a fun day,Which it always is for Ned, who is now eating a hot-fudge Sunday,You can tell it’s a Monday, because his tie is green,This Monday's tie has a bright and shiny sheen,Which the hot fudge is dripping on,He just saw it and yelled, “Hey!”Then he laughed and smeared it all around,Until his green tie looked like the face of a funny clown,
This made Ned laugh, and he’s jumping all around,Oops, he tripped over his sand castle and fell on the ground,Now his green tie is all covered in brown,Oh well, thought Ned, who rolled over and took a nap on the sandy mound,When he woke up, he said to say, “Be happy, and have a very nice day”,And also, “By the way, don't just sit there--have fun and play!”
NED LANCER #5
Another good day at the hospital,Everybody's friend, Ned Lancer, who has cancer, is slurping his purple Popsicle,His tongue is matching his dripped on tie, which looks like purple frog spittle,Meaning it’s a Tuesday, Ned said, “Oh my gosh that tickles”, A hole in his pocket, had him digging for lost nickels,As he fought the tickle on his leg, he wonders if you’re having fun and giggles,Or maybe eating giant pickles?
One nickel rolled down his pant leg, and right out the door it fled,He would have chased it, but he was kind of stuck in his hospital bed,“Aha”, he thought, this bed has wheels that touch the floor,He closed his eyes to dream, the dream he loved for evermore,
Ned dreamed he was standing on his bed; his bedspread cape was flying gold and red,His speeding bed was moving so darn fast, the nurses ran and screamed with dread,“I'm Ned Lancer, so what if I have cancer, watch out for my bed,I have to find my nickel fast, so I can get back for my meds,I mean my lucky medicines; I named the big pills Little Fred's”,
Ned’s purple tie of red and gray was flapping in his eyes and he said, “Hey!”Ned shouted at his tie, as his bed zoomed by, a whirling blur of purple, red and gray,“I'm the king of this bed and the saver of nickels today”, Ned followed with, “Hooray!”“Come on fast bed; go faster for King Ned, catch that coin before it gets away”,The bed sped fast and Ned was having a blast, on another very good hospital day,He snatched the rolling nickel fast, then rolled back to his room at last,He opened his dreaming eyes, what a cool surprise; the shots and stuff were done and passed,Tall thin Ned is always thinking of ways, to be in bed yet still have a blast,
At the end of this hospital day, Ned has this to say, “The hospital isn't so bad,In fact, it’s usually pretty funny, and if your attitude is sunny, the hospital can be, well, kind of rad,They push you around on a bed; they listen to important things you've said,In fact this one time, when I asked them to, they called me King Kong Ned,So have fun at the hospital, you just might get a Popsicle, and you always get a really cool bed.”
Another good day at the hospital,Everybody's friend, Ned Lancer, who has cancer, is slurping his purple Popsicle,His tongue is matching his dripped on tie, which looks like purple frog spittle,Meaning it’s a Tuesday, Ned said, “Oh my gosh that tickles”, A hole in his pocket, had him digging for lost nickels,As he fought the tickle on his leg, he wonders if you’re having fun and giggles,Or maybe eating giant pickles?
One nickel rolled down his pant leg, and right out the door it fled,He would have chased it, but he was kind of stuck in his hospital bed,“Aha”, he thought, this bed has wheels that touch the floor,He closed his eyes to dream, the dream he loved for evermore,
Ned dreamed he was standing on his bed; his bedspread cape was flying gold and red,His speeding bed was moving so darn fast, the nurses ran and screamed with dread,“I'm Ned Lancer, so what if I have cancer, watch out for my bed,I have to find my nickel fast, so I can get back for my meds,I mean my lucky medicines; I named the big pills Little Fred's”,
Ned’s purple tie of red and gray was flapping in his eyes and he said, “Hey!”Ned shouted at his tie, as his bed zoomed by, a whirling blur of purple, red and gray,“I'm the king of this bed and the saver of nickels today”, Ned followed with, “Hooray!”“Come on fast bed; go faster for King Ned, catch that coin before it gets away”,The bed sped fast and Ned was having a blast, on another very good hospital day,He snatched the rolling nickel fast, then rolled back to his room at last,He opened his dreaming eyes, what a cool surprise; the shots and stuff were done and passed,Tall thin Ned is always thinking of ways, to be in bed yet still have a blast,
At the end of this hospital day, Ned has this to say, “The hospital isn't so bad,In fact, it’s usually pretty funny, and if your attitude is sunny, the hospital can be, well, kind of rad,They push you around on a bed; they listen to important things you've said,In fact this one time, when I asked them to, they called me King Kong Ned,So have fun at the hospital, you just might get a Popsicle, and you always get a really cool bed.”
NED LANCER #6
It’s a CT-scan Friday for Ned Lancer,But people call it a cat-scan,So he always paints cat whiskers on his backhand,So he can move his thumb around and make up cat faced answers,To all of the Doctors questions, and “yes you can sirs”,
Ned loves the healing Doctors, and the fancy words they've said,And, he's also questioning whether you've been having fun at the hospital,Or if you've had any yummy purple or red Popsicles,Or rode in on any super cool beds?
Besides having a kitty-cat painted on his hand, The other thing silly Ned does during his cat-scan, Is he pretends that he is Batman,He talks with a funny Batman voice,He pretends everything they ask him to do, is his own “ batty” choice,And he has an invisible side-kick named Robin,In his bed, like a bat, he’d be all weavin' and bobbin,Of course, when it’s time to stay still,Ned Lancer does the best that any human can,He has cancer, so some things are important, like holding still for kitty cat-scans,
Ned thinks the cat-scan machine is cool,Like being an astronaut in outer space,Or living in a secret and magical place under the city pool,Sometimes the cat-scan voice would talk,But sometimes the nice nurse would talk, in her nice nurse squawk,Sounding like a bird mother, talking to her cute baby hawk,All Ned has to do, is hold his arms above his head and stay still,He’s a cat and batman, so he does it, with just a little of his own strong will,And that white stuff he drinks first, he says, tastes like sweet kitty-cat milk,
Ned is never sad when cat-scans are over,He usually goes straight out to find some four leaved clovers,So he can make his favorite wish,He wishes to have a tiny magical dog named Rover,That he can hold in his hand and watch him roll over and over,But he knows he’d always worries too much about the neighbor’s giant lawn mower,
The doctor said the cat-scan was over, and bye-bye,So Ned put on his orange boots and his rainbow colored tie,Off down the windy road he rode,His silver bike named Ben was playfully complaining about the heavy load,
Ned said, “Shush up Ben, I have something to tell my friends,Have fun at the cat-scan, and the blood tests, and all the rest,Because we're the only ones with cancer,So we're the ones that get to be healed by the best,All the best doctors, and all the best nurses,They're so smart; I bet they could even stop a witches phony curses,Although, I doubt they'd make very good dancers,Anyhow, where was I; did I just see that reindeer named Prancer?Oh my goodness, I think I need a nap,I'm proud of all my friends and me, so I’m putting my hands together to clap,But not too loud, because like I just said, it's time for me to gather for my nap.”
It’s a CT-scan Friday for Ned Lancer,But people call it a cat-scan,So he always paints cat whiskers on his backhand,So he can move his thumb around and make up cat faced answers,To all of the Doctors questions, and “yes you can sirs”,
Ned loves the healing Doctors, and the fancy words they've said,And, he's also questioning whether you've been having fun at the hospital,Or if you've had any yummy purple or red Popsicles,Or rode in on any super cool beds?
Besides having a kitty-cat painted on his hand, The other thing silly Ned does during his cat-scan, Is he pretends that he is Batman,He talks with a funny Batman voice,He pretends everything they ask him to do, is his own “ batty” choice,And he has an invisible side-kick named Robin,In his bed, like a bat, he’d be all weavin' and bobbin,Of course, when it’s time to stay still,Ned Lancer does the best that any human can,He has cancer, so some things are important, like holding still for kitty cat-scans,
Ned thinks the cat-scan machine is cool,Like being an astronaut in outer space,Or living in a secret and magical place under the city pool,Sometimes the cat-scan voice would talk,But sometimes the nice nurse would talk, in her nice nurse squawk,Sounding like a bird mother, talking to her cute baby hawk,All Ned has to do, is hold his arms above his head and stay still,He’s a cat and batman, so he does it, with just a little of his own strong will,And that white stuff he drinks first, he says, tastes like sweet kitty-cat milk,
Ned is never sad when cat-scans are over,He usually goes straight out to find some four leaved clovers,So he can make his favorite wish,He wishes to have a tiny magical dog named Rover,That he can hold in his hand and watch him roll over and over,But he knows he’d always worries too much about the neighbor’s giant lawn mower,
The doctor said the cat-scan was over, and bye-bye,So Ned put on his orange boots and his rainbow colored tie,Off down the windy road he rode,His silver bike named Ben was playfully complaining about the heavy load,
Ned said, “Shush up Ben, I have something to tell my friends,Have fun at the cat-scan, and the blood tests, and all the rest,Because we're the only ones with cancer,So we're the ones that get to be healed by the best,All the best doctors, and all the best nurses,They're so smart; I bet they could even stop a witches phony curses,Although, I doubt they'd make very good dancers,Anyhow, where was I; did I just see that reindeer named Prancer?Oh my goodness, I think I need a nap,I'm proud of all my friends and me, so I’m putting my hands together to clap,But not too loud, because like I just said, it's time for me to gather for my nap.”
NED LANCER #7
“Wake up Ned, you sleepy head,Get your tall tush out of bed.” That's what Ned's brother, Seester said,“I don't feel good, go away,I'll play with you some other day”,Said Ned Lancer, who has cancer,And cannot always play,
Some days Ned does not feel so great,Sometimes he throws-up all the food that he ate,On these days, he breathes at a slow and deep rate, and dreams that he is a big brown ape,Or a gray squirrel, or a red tailed hawk, or a soft red mink,Ned dreams away this Thursday, laying his weary head on his long thin tie of pink,Occasionally splashing water on his face, in the bathroom sink,Then back to his cozy bed he slinks,
Up from his nap, Ned is feeling better, with his cat Crocodile in his lap,He wonders if you've had any fun at your cancer tests, before he looks at a giant world map,He dreams of flying to faraway lands,Like Timbuktu, Kalamazoo, and everywhere you and your friends are too,He pretends he's a human plane, as he flies low over the zoos,He throws bananas as he goes, to the monkeys and baboons,They say their thanks to good 'ol’ Ned, by yelling, ooh, ooh, oohs,The cat on his lap hides, meowing her boo-hoos,
Ned still feels kind of funny,When he feels like this, he likes to read books that are funny and sunny,Books about bears, trying to get honey,Books about pigs at the county fair and books about running red bunnies,He loves to read most anything when he feels bad, or when his nose is runny,He mostly loves books that are fun, like ones about chewing magical gum,Where the bubbles solve crimes and double as plums,
Ned knows he'll feel better tomorrow,If you don't feel good, he said to let you borrow,This lucky thought, here it is, ready or not,“It's okay to feel bad and okay to feel sad,Because we know that we're special, so we should always be glad,That we know how to have fun, even when we feel sort of mad,We have cancer so we're special, and actually, things aren’t so bad.”
“Wake up Ned, you sleepy head,Get your tall tush out of bed.” That's what Ned's brother, Seester said,“I don't feel good, go away,I'll play with you some other day”,Said Ned Lancer, who has cancer,And cannot always play,
Some days Ned does not feel so great,Sometimes he throws-up all the food that he ate,On these days, he breathes at a slow and deep rate, and dreams that he is a big brown ape,Or a gray squirrel, or a red tailed hawk, or a soft red mink,Ned dreams away this Thursday, laying his weary head on his long thin tie of pink,Occasionally splashing water on his face, in the bathroom sink,Then back to his cozy bed he slinks,
Up from his nap, Ned is feeling better, with his cat Crocodile in his lap,He wonders if you've had any fun at your cancer tests, before he looks at a giant world map,He dreams of flying to faraway lands,Like Timbuktu, Kalamazoo, and everywhere you and your friends are too,He pretends he's a human plane, as he flies low over the zoos,He throws bananas as he goes, to the monkeys and baboons,They say their thanks to good 'ol’ Ned, by yelling, ooh, ooh, oohs,The cat on his lap hides, meowing her boo-hoos,
Ned still feels kind of funny,When he feels like this, he likes to read books that are funny and sunny,Books about bears, trying to get honey,Books about pigs at the county fair and books about running red bunnies,He loves to read most anything when he feels bad, or when his nose is runny,He mostly loves books that are fun, like ones about chewing magical gum,Where the bubbles solve crimes and double as plums,
Ned knows he'll feel better tomorrow,If you don't feel good, he said to let you borrow,This lucky thought, here it is, ready or not,“It's okay to feel bad and okay to feel sad,Because we know that we're special, so we should always be glad,That we know how to have fun, even when we feel sort of mad,We have cancer so we're special, and actually, things aren’t so bad.”
NED LANCER #8
Today, Ned Lancer went for a hike,Without Ben, his silver bike, All he needed was his walking stick, named Rick,And the old walking trail down by the flowing crick,
Granny Greeny always called it a crick, but Ned prefers to say creek,He also prefers his green tie, so you know it’s the first day of the week,Ned climbs on top of big round rocks,And he screeches out, like a bird, to all the circling hawks,
He likes to hike alone the most,Just him and mother nature and some peanut butter and honey toast,He always packed snacks in his big black back-pack,It’s important to keep his health on good tracks,
Ned chases butterflies and bees chase Ned,He chases around in circles, and his green tie keeps hitting him in the head,It’s a Monday hike by the crick/creek, near the bunny-hop-hills,Enjoying the frills and the thrills and the trips and spills,
“Hey Ned Lancer, can I hike with you?” Calls out Miss Pritty, Ned is surprised she knows his name, and answers rather briskly, “I walk by your house sometimes, but I thought you always missed me”,That's what they both said, before meeting at the fork in the road,Then they played follow the leader, until his black back-pack became too heavy a load,
They sat and had lunch, where Ned shared his toast and most of his fruit punch,“Can I tell you something, Miss Pritty?” asked Ned, “You'll understand, I have a hunch,I'm being treated for cancer, and that's okay, I'm still normal, do you understand?”Pritty said, “Of course I do, you silly goose”, and off they skipped, hand in hand,
As they skip on down the rocky path of dirt,Ned wonders if you've been having special fun, even when you’re sad or you hurt,He waves good-bye for now, as he slips and almost steps in the doo-doo of a cow,He says to say, “Treat every new day, as a great new day, and the best day is always now.”
Today, Ned Lancer went for a hike,Without Ben, his silver bike, All he needed was his walking stick, named Rick,And the old walking trail down by the flowing crick,
Granny Greeny always called it a crick, but Ned prefers to say creek,He also prefers his green tie, so you know it’s the first day of the week,Ned climbs on top of big round rocks,And he screeches out, like a bird, to all the circling hawks,
He likes to hike alone the most,Just him and mother nature and some peanut butter and honey toast,He always packed snacks in his big black back-pack,It’s important to keep his health on good tracks,
Ned chases butterflies and bees chase Ned,He chases around in circles, and his green tie keeps hitting him in the head,It’s a Monday hike by the crick/creek, near the bunny-hop-hills,Enjoying the frills and the thrills and the trips and spills,
“Hey Ned Lancer, can I hike with you?” Calls out Miss Pritty, Ned is surprised she knows his name, and answers rather briskly, “I walk by your house sometimes, but I thought you always missed me”,That's what they both said, before meeting at the fork in the road,Then they played follow the leader, until his black back-pack became too heavy a load,
They sat and had lunch, where Ned shared his toast and most of his fruit punch,“Can I tell you something, Miss Pritty?” asked Ned, “You'll understand, I have a hunch,I'm being treated for cancer, and that's okay, I'm still normal, do you understand?”Pritty said, “Of course I do, you silly goose”, and off they skipped, hand in hand,
As they skip on down the rocky path of dirt,Ned wonders if you've been having special fun, even when you’re sad or you hurt,He waves good-bye for now, as he slips and almost steps in the doo-doo of a cow,He says to say, “Treat every new day, as a great new day, and the best day is always now.”
NED LANCER #9
It's a Tuesday morning, oh boy, Ned Lancer is big, but he still loves to play with toys,The truth is, every morning is fun to Ned, so he always looks for life's little joys,With his Tuesday purple tie flopping around,Ned plays with his tattered toys, pretty soon they become scattered in a big mound,
Before he knows it, his toy pile reaches to the skies,Up through the puffy clouds, beyond the sight of seeing eyes, He climbed to the top of the pile, to see what he could see, But half way on his pile high climb, the pile became too wobbly,
The pile of toys came crashing to the ground,But ol' Ned didn’t much care, nah, he was laughing like a clown,He simply said, “What the hay,” then gathered and put his toys away,He figured there would be a mess, if he played with and piled his toys that way,
He walked and he whistled, over toward the swings near the park gate,He wonders if you are doing as he hopes, and treating everyday day like it is great,You and Ned Lancer, you both have cancer, you're special, but Ned always says, “Big deal,If you know how to have fun, if you want to have fun, now that's a big deal, for real”,
Ned met a boy and girl on the swings,He swung right in between them, and then he started to sing,“~Let's swing high, lets swing low, I'll tie my swirly purple tie, into a curly bow,And if we fly too high, into the clear blue sky, we'll feel giggles in our little piggy wiggly toes ~,
The gang of three sang songs of glee,Then Ned swung free, flew high, and landed in a tree, His foot was stuck between two branches, it was snared, He was a little scared; but worse, two bluebirds started nesting in his hair,
Ned finally climbed down to the ground, after getting his boot outta the branch,He said goodbye to the nesting bluebirds, Mr. Br-Bird, and his Br-wife Blanch,As Ned went run, run, running home, in his thoughts, he want, want, wanted you to know,“It doesn't matter if our bodies are slowed, our minds can always grow and grow.”
It's a Tuesday morning, oh boy, Ned Lancer is big, but he still loves to play with toys,The truth is, every morning is fun to Ned, so he always looks for life's little joys,With his Tuesday purple tie flopping around,Ned plays with his tattered toys, pretty soon they become scattered in a big mound,
Before he knows it, his toy pile reaches to the skies,Up through the puffy clouds, beyond the sight of seeing eyes, He climbed to the top of the pile, to see what he could see, But half way on his pile high climb, the pile became too wobbly,
The pile of toys came crashing to the ground,But ol' Ned didn’t much care, nah, he was laughing like a clown,He simply said, “What the hay,” then gathered and put his toys away,He figured there would be a mess, if he played with and piled his toys that way,
He walked and he whistled, over toward the swings near the park gate,He wonders if you are doing as he hopes, and treating everyday day like it is great,You and Ned Lancer, you both have cancer, you're special, but Ned always says, “Big deal,If you know how to have fun, if you want to have fun, now that's a big deal, for real”,
Ned met a boy and girl on the swings,He swung right in between them, and then he started to sing,“~Let's swing high, lets swing low, I'll tie my swirly purple tie, into a curly bow,And if we fly too high, into the clear blue sky, we'll feel giggles in our little piggy wiggly toes ~,
The gang of three sang songs of glee,Then Ned swung free, flew high, and landed in a tree, His foot was stuck between two branches, it was snared, He was a little scared; but worse, two bluebirds started nesting in his hair,
Ned finally climbed down to the ground, after getting his boot outta the branch,He said goodbye to the nesting bluebirds, Mr. Br-Bird, and his Br-wife Blanch,As Ned went run, run, running home, in his thoughts, he want, want, wanted you to know,“It doesn't matter if our bodies are slowed, our minds can always grow and grow.”
NED LANCER #10
Our friend tall Ned, gets out of his big round bed, scratching an itch on his smooth bald head,He put on his yellow tie, walked around to the other side, then fell back in bed and read,Ned loves to read books, about baiting shiny hooks and fishing in fish filled brooks,And stories of cops and robbers, when the good little guys, catch the big bad crooks,
Wednesdays are resting days for Ned Lancer, you know, he's like you, he has cancer too,Sometimes it's best to just rest in white pajamas, eating bananas and reading a story or two,As he lays and reads this time, he wonders if you're growing your awesome minds,He sets down his book, closes his eyes, and searches for dreams where he'll have a good time,
He dreams you are a giant bird, with gold and silver wings of fire,Your fiery wings propel you high, above the clouds, then even higher,Past the moon, into outer space, a skyrocketing bird, beyond the human race,Then you roll over and fall out of bed, from space, then you spring back up, with a feather stuck to your surprised face, Ned grabs your feather, to play with Crocodile the cat, and his tiny turtle Big Red,
Then he cuddles to sleep, with them both snuggle-wuggled in his bed, it’s a lazy day, and in his crazy way,Ned sleeps, so the next day he'll be fresh and ready to play,
If the next day isn't too hot and sunny,Maybe he'll play with his brother, Seester; who is usually very funny,Or maybe he'll skip to the bunny hop hills,And show off to Miss Pritty, his hopscotch skills,
Or maybe he'll look for sea shells by the sea shore,That's where Shelley Shell's sells sea shells in her sea store,Maybe he'll see an otter, or a dolphin, or a whale,Or one of those fast boats, with the big white sails,
Whatever he does, wherever he goes, Ned is bound to have fun,The beach or the hospital, Ned doesn't care, he'll have good fun anywhere,Ned will most surely, most surely, have fun, have fun, whatever it takes,Even if he’s in bed all day, ol' Ned would have fun with a book about snakes,
Books read today, two, naps took today, four,Before this day's done and we close Wednesday's door,Ned says to have fun, even when cancer makes you feel weird,Then he fell to sleep again, with Crocodile snuggling in his tiny beard.
Our friend tall Ned, gets out of his big round bed, scratching an itch on his smooth bald head,He put on his yellow tie, walked around to the other side, then fell back in bed and read,Ned loves to read books, about baiting shiny hooks and fishing in fish filled brooks,And stories of cops and robbers, when the good little guys, catch the big bad crooks,
Wednesdays are resting days for Ned Lancer, you know, he's like you, he has cancer too,Sometimes it's best to just rest in white pajamas, eating bananas and reading a story or two,As he lays and reads this time, he wonders if you're growing your awesome minds,He sets down his book, closes his eyes, and searches for dreams where he'll have a good time,
He dreams you are a giant bird, with gold and silver wings of fire,Your fiery wings propel you high, above the clouds, then even higher,Past the moon, into outer space, a skyrocketing bird, beyond the human race,Then you roll over and fall out of bed, from space, then you spring back up, with a feather stuck to your surprised face, Ned grabs your feather, to play with Crocodile the cat, and his tiny turtle Big Red,
Then he cuddles to sleep, with them both snuggle-wuggled in his bed, it’s a lazy day, and in his crazy way,Ned sleeps, so the next day he'll be fresh and ready to play,
If the next day isn't too hot and sunny,Maybe he'll play with his brother, Seester; who is usually very funny,Or maybe he'll skip to the bunny hop hills,And show off to Miss Pritty, his hopscotch skills,
Or maybe he'll look for sea shells by the sea shore,That's where Shelley Shell's sells sea shells in her sea store,Maybe he'll see an otter, or a dolphin, or a whale,Or one of those fast boats, with the big white sails,
Whatever he does, wherever he goes, Ned is bound to have fun,The beach or the hospital, Ned doesn't care, he'll have good fun anywhere,Ned will most surely, most surely, have fun, have fun, whatever it takes,Even if he’s in bed all day, ol' Ned would have fun with a book about snakes,
Books read today, two, naps took today, four,Before this day's done and we close Wednesday's door,Ned says to have fun, even when cancer makes you feel weird,Then he fell to sleep again, with Crocodile snuggling in his tiny beard.
NED LANCER #11
Oops, Ned Lancer threw-up on his grandpa's new suit, “Sorry”, said Ned,Then he threw-up again, in his own orange boots,Ned apologized to his boots, then he cleaned up and chewed some gum,Some days, because of chemotherapy or radiation treatments, it’s harder to have good fun,
Even happy Ned sometimes feels dread, so he stays all day in his big round bed,But he knows that his best fun grows, inside of his own funny head,For example, he likes to call throw-up, barf,Sometimes he barfs, and pretends he’s a dog, barking, arf-arf-arf,Big deal thought Ned, the more I barf, the more hospital food I can scarf,
He knows that cancer treatments sometimes make you sick,Of course, it is yucky being sick to your tummy, and barfing is kind of ick,It's just a thing cancer patients have to deal with, he knows,So he does what the doctors say he should do, and then he lets the good times roll,
Ned wonders if you're feeling weird like him, yet still having a little fun,Today he just wants to lie while you play, and pretend he's you, on top of a giant hamburger bun,He imagines you running on top of the burger, and you're chasing the trail of a ketchup burglar,Until you come to the edge, where the bun, lettuce, and onion merger,
You bounce off the onion like it’s a diving board,Springing high into the air, you fly and you soar,Then you plop back on top, and start doing the hamburger flop, It's a dance where you shake your hands, like you cannot stop,Until your fingers are flopping around, like the head of a mop, Then you slip and fall, and land on the edge of some lettuce,You scream, “Help, the avalanche of mustard is coming to get us”,
Suddenly, Ned wakes up from his silly burger dream,And just in time, he was about to scream,He wipes sweat from his forehead, with the tip of his pink tie,Then he says to say goodbye, with a wink of his twinkle-eye, and a happy sigh,
Wait, Ned said to say, “It's okay, if you have to barf, barf, barf all day,Just use a mat for your knees, so your pants don't fray,And after you barf and clean yourself up, have a mint or some gum, because your breath is stinky.”This made Ned laugh at himself, so hard he fell on his tush, poor boy, But he bounced right back up, just like you, because he fell on top of a slinky toy.
Oops, Ned Lancer threw-up on his grandpa's new suit, “Sorry”, said Ned,Then he threw-up again, in his own orange boots,Ned apologized to his boots, then he cleaned up and chewed some gum,Some days, because of chemotherapy or radiation treatments, it’s harder to have good fun,
Even happy Ned sometimes feels dread, so he stays all day in his big round bed,But he knows that his best fun grows, inside of his own funny head,For example, he likes to call throw-up, barf,Sometimes he barfs, and pretends he’s a dog, barking, arf-arf-arf,Big deal thought Ned, the more I barf, the more hospital food I can scarf,
He knows that cancer treatments sometimes make you sick,Of course, it is yucky being sick to your tummy, and barfing is kind of ick,It's just a thing cancer patients have to deal with, he knows,So he does what the doctors say he should do, and then he lets the good times roll,
Ned wonders if you're feeling weird like him, yet still having a little fun,Today he just wants to lie while you play, and pretend he's you, on top of a giant hamburger bun,He imagines you running on top of the burger, and you're chasing the trail of a ketchup burglar,Until you come to the edge, where the bun, lettuce, and onion merger,
You bounce off the onion like it’s a diving board,Springing high into the air, you fly and you soar,Then you plop back on top, and start doing the hamburger flop, It's a dance where you shake your hands, like you cannot stop,Until your fingers are flopping around, like the head of a mop, Then you slip and fall, and land on the edge of some lettuce,You scream, “Help, the avalanche of mustard is coming to get us”,
Suddenly, Ned wakes up from his silly burger dream,And just in time, he was about to scream,He wipes sweat from his forehead, with the tip of his pink tie,Then he says to say goodbye, with a wink of his twinkle-eye, and a happy sigh,
Wait, Ned said to say, “It's okay, if you have to barf, barf, barf all day,Just use a mat for your knees, so your pants don't fray,And after you barf and clean yourself up, have a mint or some gum, because your breath is stinky.”This made Ned laugh at himself, so hard he fell on his tush, poor boy, But he bounced right back up, just like you, because he fell on top of a slinky toy.
NED LANCER #12
If you've ever seen a clown,Trying to tie his big shoes while riding on a merry-go-round,Maybe you can imagine how ol' Ned looks, with a frustrated frown,Every time he tries to tie, the strings of his own hospital gown,
Ned just took off his favorite rainbow tie, and all of his clothes,He put them in the plastic bag, as told so by round Nurse Rose,Then he pulled on the hospital socks over his long thin toes,It’s a Friday, and once again, Ned's backless gown is making him twitch his nose,
He says, “How am I supposed to tie this thing shut?So when I walk around, other patients and nurses won't see my naked butt”,
Ned laughed at what he just said, but his face is starting to strain and turn red,Because the strings that tie his gown, are serpent-like slippery threads,“Come back here!” Ned yelled, as he spun around and pled,
While he chases the tying strings, and starts spinning round and round,Ned hopes you aren't sick to your stomach today, and barfing on the ground,Because he’s getting sick to his stomach now, from too much spinning,In his attempt to tie his backless hospital gown,Our friend, Ned, is surely not, surely not winning.
Even though Ned Lancer, has cancer just like you,And those silly hospital gowns that tie in the back, make him spin around until he's blue,He still thinks trying to tie the gown on his own is fun,Especially when the tying, of the perfect tying job, is perfectly done,
Ned says, “Everyday, is a made for fun day,Even when you barf, you get to chew some yummy gum, yay,Next time your hospital gown can't be tied, and your fingers are tangled in a fuss,Pretend you can tie it easily, as though you're an eight legged octopus,And remember cancer friends”, says Ned; “It's always okay, To ask for help, if you can't do hospital stuff by yourself, just say,‘Will somebody please help, so I can move on with my day and play?’That's why the hospital has all those great nurses! Hooray!”
Ned thinks it’s fun to play with the gown, and tie the perfect bow,And the perfect bow, is the one you like, tied high and tight, or loose and low,He says he's impressed with anyone, who can tie their own gowns at all,Ned puts back on his rainbow tie then walks on proud and tall,He walks on looking for a game to play, that involves any bouncing ball.
If you've ever seen a clown,Trying to tie his big shoes while riding on a merry-go-round,Maybe you can imagine how ol' Ned looks, with a frustrated frown,Every time he tries to tie, the strings of his own hospital gown,
Ned just took off his favorite rainbow tie, and all of his clothes,He put them in the plastic bag, as told so by round Nurse Rose,Then he pulled on the hospital socks over his long thin toes,It’s a Friday, and once again, Ned's backless gown is making him twitch his nose,
He says, “How am I supposed to tie this thing shut?So when I walk around, other patients and nurses won't see my naked butt”,
Ned laughed at what he just said, but his face is starting to strain and turn red,Because the strings that tie his gown, are serpent-like slippery threads,“Come back here!” Ned yelled, as he spun around and pled,
While he chases the tying strings, and starts spinning round and round,Ned hopes you aren't sick to your stomach today, and barfing on the ground,Because he’s getting sick to his stomach now, from too much spinning,In his attempt to tie his backless hospital gown,Our friend, Ned, is surely not, surely not winning.
Even though Ned Lancer, has cancer just like you,And those silly hospital gowns that tie in the back, make him spin around until he's blue,He still thinks trying to tie the gown on his own is fun,Especially when the tying, of the perfect tying job, is perfectly done,
Ned says, “Everyday, is a made for fun day,Even when you barf, you get to chew some yummy gum, yay,Next time your hospital gown can't be tied, and your fingers are tangled in a fuss,Pretend you can tie it easily, as though you're an eight legged octopus,And remember cancer friends”, says Ned; “It's always okay, To ask for help, if you can't do hospital stuff by yourself, just say,‘Will somebody please help, so I can move on with my day and play?’That's why the hospital has all those great nurses! Hooray!”
Ned thinks it’s fun to play with the gown, and tie the perfect bow,And the perfect bow, is the one you like, tied high and tight, or loose and low,He says he's impressed with anyone, who can tie their own gowns at all,Ned puts back on his rainbow tie then walks on proud and tall,He walks on looking for a game to play, that involves any bouncing ball.
NED LANCER #13
Ned Lancer looked at his clock and then rolled out of bed,On some mornings he just can't get that word, cancer, out of his head,On these mornings he loves to ride his bike,And pedal incredibly fast, until it zooms near the speed of light,
Then, with the wind on his head without hair,Ned rides his silver bike Ben, with nary a care,Ned likes the word nary, it kind of means, no or nothing,He learned the word from his favorite teacher, who always taught him something,
I just heard Ned say, “Come on Ben, let’s ride faster today,And make that dastardly word cancer, go far-far away”,Actually and factually, cancer is just a word that people use,To describe the sickness, that is affecting Ned and you,
Some days, he just doesn't want to think about that word,So he does something fun to help him forget,Like riding his skateboard off of the tallest curbs,Or riding Ben over some gnarly jumps, so they could fly high and sing with the birds,
On one big jump, Ned's black tie flipped up into his mouth,He coughed, and gagged, and snorted like a pig,But the black tie would not spit out,
Lucky for Ned, a red-tailed hawk flew by, The passing hawk squawked, when it saw panic in Ned's twinkly eyes,So, the squawking hawk swooped, And pulled the tie free from Ned's mouth, who whooped “woo-hoo”,Then away the hero hawk’s red tail flew,
Ned had just enjoyed such a wild ride,That the word cancer had gone away for the day, to run and hide,This made Ned laugh, until he had a funny tickle in his side,
Ned wonders, as he rides Ben back home,If you asked for help with any hard stuff at the hospital, the last time you were there alone,Not easy stuff like, where can your imaginary dog bury its imaginary bone,But the stuff that makes you feel proud and brave and happy as a talked on phone,
Ned ends this day, a Saturday, with this to say,“Don't let the word cancer make you afraid,People needed a word to describe our illness,So cancer is simply the word that people made,Forget it by doing something fun, for part of each and every day,Like being the superstar of your own dancing cancer parade.
Ned Lancer looked at his clock and then rolled out of bed,On some mornings he just can't get that word, cancer, out of his head,On these mornings he loves to ride his bike,And pedal incredibly fast, until it zooms near the speed of light,
Then, with the wind on his head without hair,Ned rides his silver bike Ben, with nary a care,Ned likes the word nary, it kind of means, no or nothing,He learned the word from his favorite teacher, who always taught him something,
I just heard Ned say, “Come on Ben, let’s ride faster today,And make that dastardly word cancer, go far-far away”,Actually and factually, cancer is just a word that people use,To describe the sickness, that is affecting Ned and you,
Some days, he just doesn't want to think about that word,So he does something fun to help him forget,Like riding his skateboard off of the tallest curbs,Or riding Ben over some gnarly jumps, so they could fly high and sing with the birds,
On one big jump, Ned's black tie flipped up into his mouth,He coughed, and gagged, and snorted like a pig,But the black tie would not spit out,
Lucky for Ned, a red-tailed hawk flew by, The passing hawk squawked, when it saw panic in Ned's twinkly eyes,So, the squawking hawk swooped, And pulled the tie free from Ned's mouth, who whooped “woo-hoo”,Then away the hero hawk’s red tail flew,
Ned had just enjoyed such a wild ride,That the word cancer had gone away for the day, to run and hide,This made Ned laugh, until he had a funny tickle in his side,
Ned wonders, as he rides Ben back home,If you asked for help with any hard stuff at the hospital, the last time you were there alone,Not easy stuff like, where can your imaginary dog bury its imaginary bone,But the stuff that makes you feel proud and brave and happy as a talked on phone,
Ned ends this day, a Saturday, with this to say,“Don't let the word cancer make you afraid,People needed a word to describe our illness,So cancer is simply the word that people made,Forget it by doing something fun, for part of each and every day,Like being the superstar of your own dancing cancer parade.
NED LANCER #14
With his thumbs dancing on the control buttons,And moving the joystick fast, with the same joy he has when he eats chocolate muffins,Ned Lancer is playing, and chillin', through cancer, like it’s nothin’,He’s eating up the fun of his favorite video game, and it’s a tough one,Like a pig slurping up its sloppy-slop, with the chomping-chomp of a sloppy glutton,
A glutton is something that eats way too much,And Ned's fingers are like a glutton, on the video game controllers and such,He taps them until his fingers hurt to the slightest touch,Ned knows that sometimes a little pain is all just part of playing a winning game,Like when he holds still, for the pinch of a healing shot,Or when he can't play outside, which is always very lame,As the game he was playing ended and the screen filled with celebrating cartoon dancers,Ned wonders if you're kind of like him, and you're no longer very scared by the word cancer,
He’s wearing a Sunday fun-way tie, That he let some girls pick-out,It’s the color of a delicious pumpkin pie,He thought it was and actually licked it, the first time he spied it with his twinkly eye,Then he ran around flitting and spitting to get the taste out, as though he swallowed a fly,
Tall thin Ned Lancer is tired today, from the treatments on his cancer,So he’s curled up on his big round bed,With Crocodile the cat, who is playing with turtle Big Red,On days when Ned is feeling tummy sick, as though sailing on rough ocean seas, Like, when he’s feeling icky and maybe barfing on his knees,Our friend ol' Ned just takes it easy,
So his tummy doesn't get overly queasy,On days like this, when he feels really bad,A part of him stays happy and it makes him feel kind of rad,Because he knows how tough and awesome and cool he really is, and it makes him glad,To be fighting through cancer with friends like you, and because you're fighting cancer together,He can smile a little more than a little, on days when he feels under the weather,
Under the weather, means you're not feeling so great,But ol' Ned imagines it means that he’s stuck on a tiny boat, on a giant lake,And a humongous stormy cloud is raining chocolate cakes,With a fork in one hand and a plate in the other,Ned catches and eats cake, until his face is smothered,With so much chocolate frosting, That he can't even see, and then the boat started rocking and tossing,
But just before he fell out, he realized it was just a dream,Good thing too, he thought, he was about to panic and scream,And the scream would have been yelled at the flying cake, For being served, without yummy ice-cream after baked,
On days when our friend lays around to rest and feel better,He has easy fun by writing short songs and long letters, Or long stories and short poems,Writing is always a good time, at a time when you shouldn't really leave your home,Ned says you should try to write some uplifting stuff,As he curls up with Crocodile cat, and gives her fur a scruff and fluff.
With his thumbs dancing on the control buttons,And moving the joystick fast, with the same joy he has when he eats chocolate muffins,Ned Lancer is playing, and chillin', through cancer, like it’s nothin’,He’s eating up the fun of his favorite video game, and it’s a tough one,Like a pig slurping up its sloppy-slop, with the chomping-chomp of a sloppy glutton,
A glutton is something that eats way too much,And Ned's fingers are like a glutton, on the video game controllers and such,He taps them until his fingers hurt to the slightest touch,Ned knows that sometimes a little pain is all just part of playing a winning game,Like when he holds still, for the pinch of a healing shot,Or when he can't play outside, which is always very lame,As the game he was playing ended and the screen filled with celebrating cartoon dancers,Ned wonders if you're kind of like him, and you're no longer very scared by the word cancer,
He’s wearing a Sunday fun-way tie, That he let some girls pick-out,It’s the color of a delicious pumpkin pie,He thought it was and actually licked it, the first time he spied it with his twinkly eye,Then he ran around flitting and spitting to get the taste out, as though he swallowed a fly,
Tall thin Ned Lancer is tired today, from the treatments on his cancer,So he’s curled up on his big round bed,With Crocodile the cat, who is playing with turtle Big Red,On days when Ned is feeling tummy sick, as though sailing on rough ocean seas, Like, when he’s feeling icky and maybe barfing on his knees,Our friend ol' Ned just takes it easy,
So his tummy doesn't get overly queasy,On days like this, when he feels really bad,A part of him stays happy and it makes him feel kind of rad,Because he knows how tough and awesome and cool he really is, and it makes him glad,To be fighting through cancer with friends like you, and because you're fighting cancer together,He can smile a little more than a little, on days when he feels under the weather,
Under the weather, means you're not feeling so great,But ol' Ned imagines it means that he’s stuck on a tiny boat, on a giant lake,And a humongous stormy cloud is raining chocolate cakes,With a fork in one hand and a plate in the other,Ned catches and eats cake, until his face is smothered,With so much chocolate frosting, That he can't even see, and then the boat started rocking and tossing,
But just before he fell out, he realized it was just a dream,Good thing too, he thought, he was about to panic and scream,And the scream would have been yelled at the flying cake, For being served, without yummy ice-cream after baked,
On days when our friend lays around to rest and feel better,He has easy fun by writing short songs and long letters, Or long stories and short poems,Writing is always a good time, at a time when you shouldn't really leave your home,Ned says you should try to write some uplifting stuff,As he curls up with Crocodile cat, and gives her fur a scruff and fluff.
NED LANCER #15
It’s a rainy Monday, which isn't the best fun day,But Ned smiles and never says woe is me, in fact, whenever it rains, he loves to write poetry,So he sits down with an open and blank book,His green tie lies in the crease of the blank book's nook,As he writes a poem about fishing, fishing without a hook,
“I sit on the dock at the end of my stroll,I fish for fat fish in the old water hole, With nary a hook, not even a pole, I just dangle my feet until fish start to roll,
They roll to the top,They flip and they flop, The smell of my feet makes them jump 'till they plop,Right into my bucket, which I borrowed from the mop,
My feet smell just like a fishy, fish you see,And I soak my fishy feet in the bucket, from noon until three,So when fish jump into the bucket, to make a new fish friend,Instead they're coming home for dinner, right after I wash my feet, the end."
Ned has fun writing silly poems and making them rhyme,He doesn't have to go anywhere, to enjoy his daily time,He wonders if you've been writing any funny stuff,About clouds, or rain or sunny stuff,He thinks people like you and him, with cancer,Think harder and better than most, so you're best at finding the answers,To questions about what's fun to read,So you and Ned think of good words to write, yes you do indeed,
As tall thin Ned changes his dark green tie, for a light green tie, with tiny spots of red,He says you should read and write a lot, if you're too often stuck in bed,Your thoughts are as big as the universe, books and stories are born in your head,Ned never complains when it starts to rain, he reads or writes books to be read.
It’s a rainy Monday, which isn't the best fun day,But Ned smiles and never says woe is me, in fact, whenever it rains, he loves to write poetry,So he sits down with an open and blank book,His green tie lies in the crease of the blank book's nook,As he writes a poem about fishing, fishing without a hook,
“I sit on the dock at the end of my stroll,I fish for fat fish in the old water hole, With nary a hook, not even a pole, I just dangle my feet until fish start to roll,
They roll to the top,They flip and they flop, The smell of my feet makes them jump 'till they plop,Right into my bucket, which I borrowed from the mop,
My feet smell just like a fishy, fish you see,And I soak my fishy feet in the bucket, from noon until three,So when fish jump into the bucket, to make a new fish friend,Instead they're coming home for dinner, right after I wash my feet, the end."
Ned has fun writing silly poems and making them rhyme,He doesn't have to go anywhere, to enjoy his daily time,He wonders if you've been writing any funny stuff,About clouds, or rain or sunny stuff,He thinks people like you and him, with cancer,Think harder and better than most, so you're best at finding the answers,To questions about what's fun to read,So you and Ned think of good words to write, yes you do indeed,
As tall thin Ned changes his dark green tie, for a light green tie, with tiny spots of red,He says you should read and write a lot, if you're too often stuck in bed,Your thoughts are as big as the universe, books and stories are born in your head,Ned never complains when it starts to rain, he reads or writes books to be read.
NED LANCER #16
The letter big C, is for Crocodile today,Hooray, and the letter A, is for Ate, Yep, that will work just great,Thought Ned Lancer, who likes having fun with all words, even cancer,
N will be for his name, Ned, and the second C, will be for, um...cookie,After that was said, Ned peeked in his cookie jar, to have a cookie lookie-lookie,He took out a cookie and crumbled it all about, until he formed the letter E, and said then,“Today, the letter E will stand for the word, Even.”
All that was left to spell cancer, was the letter R,And this day it stands for, Running.Ned won't let cancer be a bad word, so he chooses to make it funny,
Ned gathered up all of the cancer letter words,He added a letter or two and considered adding some verbs,Then with a proud grin and a twinkle in his eye, And after touching every dot on his polka-dotted purple tie,He said, “Today's cancer letter word is, barely makes sense, but I tried”,
CROCODILE ATE NED’S COOKIE EVEN RUNNING
‘Crocodile Ate Ned's Cookie, Even Running’It barely made any sense, but Ned didn't care if it was less than cunning,He could do whatever he wanted with the word cancer, if he pleased,Because just like you, he has it, so he's no longer scared of the word, he says, “Jeez,It's just a word, like flu, or mumps, and we’re braver than you think”,Ned thought some big words doctors used, actually sounded more like a sneeze,
Enough of the fun wordplay for one day,Thought Ned to himself, and then to you, he had this to say,“I hope you've been reading and writing some,I think it's okay to use the word cancer, even if cancer's no fun”,Ned reads and he writes, happily filling in days until it’s night,With words that seem scary, he takes out the fright,
The letter big C, is for Crocodile today,Hooray, and the letter A, is for Ate, Yep, that will work just great,Thought Ned Lancer, who likes having fun with all words, even cancer,
N will be for his name, Ned, and the second C, will be for, um...cookie,After that was said, Ned peeked in his cookie jar, to have a cookie lookie-lookie,He took out a cookie and crumbled it all about, until he formed the letter E, and said then,“Today, the letter E will stand for the word, Even.”
All that was left to spell cancer, was the letter R,And this day it stands for, Running.Ned won't let cancer be a bad word, so he chooses to make it funny,
Ned gathered up all of the cancer letter words,He added a letter or two and considered adding some verbs,Then with a proud grin and a twinkle in his eye, And after touching every dot on his polka-dotted purple tie,He said, “Today's cancer letter word is, barely makes sense, but I tried”,
CROCODILE ATE NED’S COOKIE EVEN RUNNING
‘Crocodile Ate Ned's Cookie, Even Running’It barely made any sense, but Ned didn't care if it was less than cunning,He could do whatever he wanted with the word cancer, if he pleased,Because just like you, he has it, so he's no longer scared of the word, he says, “Jeez,It's just a word, like flu, or mumps, and we’re braver than you think”,Ned thought some big words doctors used, actually sounded more like a sneeze,
Enough of the fun wordplay for one day,Thought Ned to himself, and then to you, he had this to say,“I hope you've been reading and writing some,I think it's okay to use the word cancer, even if cancer's no fun”,Ned reads and he writes, happily filling in days until it’s night,With words that seem scary, he takes out the fright,
NED LANCER #17
It’s a Wednesday in spring, so you know that Ned is sleeping more than anything,With his yellow tie and white pajamas, he’s talking to his pillow, like it was listening,“Listen up Willow, my golden pillow, I'm thinking of a word, and the word is, cancer, okay,Instead of cancer, the word could be murple, glorpy, or flooray,Cancer is just the word that describes our sickness, so cancer is what we have, we say,
Oh Willow, my pillow, are you even paying attention?Just the other day, I was at this comic book convention,And this man walked up to me to say, ‘Put silly books away, laughing is not the answer’,“I disagree”, Ned heard himself say and added, “Laughing has helped me through cancer.”The man said, “You can't laugh at a word like that”, Ned said, “I'm sorry, but yes I can sir.”
Off Ned ran with a bang, he ran and skipped and sang, a made-up song, out loud it rang,
~ “Oh, cancer is not funny, but it’s still okay to laugh at the word, Cancer isn't cute like a bunny, and I think it's a bit of a dodo bird, Oh, if laughing at cancer, makes me a goofy nerd, Well, I don't care, I don't care, because I have cancer and cancer is just a word ~”
After the song, Ned snuggled his bald head into pillow Willow, to do some post song sleeping,Then he wondered if you've been writing and reading, then his dream frog woke up to start leaping,Ribbit bounce, ribbit bounce, ribbit bounce, hop,The dream frog jumped from dream to dream, until Ned asked it to stop,
Today's frog-dream stopped on foggy ice-skating with chocolate ice-cream,The boys were playing tag and the girls were playing scream,Ned smiled as he snuggled pillow Willow, and leaned into his dream,Twinkles escaped his wrinkling shut eyes, or so it seemed,When he woke, he tried to remember the dreams, to ponder what those dreamy dreams mean,
With his dream hunger fed, Ned lays back in his big round bed,He thinks you might have fun dreaming too, under your very own bed spread,He wants to share a dream with you tonight,So he says to dream of something happy and something bright,Dream with chipmunks left or dream with monkey’s right, please dream a fun dream with Ned tonight.
It’s a Wednesday in spring, so you know that Ned is sleeping more than anything,With his yellow tie and white pajamas, he’s talking to his pillow, like it was listening,“Listen up Willow, my golden pillow, I'm thinking of a word, and the word is, cancer, okay,Instead of cancer, the word could be murple, glorpy, or flooray,Cancer is just the word that describes our sickness, so cancer is what we have, we say,
Oh Willow, my pillow, are you even paying attention?Just the other day, I was at this comic book convention,And this man walked up to me to say, ‘Put silly books away, laughing is not the answer’,“I disagree”, Ned heard himself say and added, “Laughing has helped me through cancer.”The man said, “You can't laugh at a word like that”, Ned said, “I'm sorry, but yes I can sir.”
Off Ned ran with a bang, he ran and skipped and sang, a made-up song, out loud it rang,
~ “Oh, cancer is not funny, but it’s still okay to laugh at the word, Cancer isn't cute like a bunny, and I think it's a bit of a dodo bird, Oh, if laughing at cancer, makes me a goofy nerd, Well, I don't care, I don't care, because I have cancer and cancer is just a word ~”
After the song, Ned snuggled his bald head into pillow Willow, to do some post song sleeping,Then he wondered if you've been writing and reading, then his dream frog woke up to start leaping,Ribbit bounce, ribbit bounce, ribbit bounce, hop,The dream frog jumped from dream to dream, until Ned asked it to stop,
Today's frog-dream stopped on foggy ice-skating with chocolate ice-cream,The boys were playing tag and the girls were playing scream,Ned smiled as he snuggled pillow Willow, and leaned into his dream,Twinkles escaped his wrinkling shut eyes, or so it seemed,When he woke, he tried to remember the dreams, to ponder what those dreamy dreams mean,
With his dream hunger fed, Ned lays back in his big round bed,He thinks you might have fun dreaming too, under your very own bed spread,He wants to share a dream with you tonight,So he says to dream of something happy and something bright,Dream with chipmunks left or dream with monkey’s right, please dream a fun dream with Ned tonight.
NED LANCER #18
Ned’s rolling on the floor laughing, and nobody knows why, He’s laughing so hard, laughing tears spill from his eyes,It’s a laughing fit, like when people tickle his sides,
“Why are you laughing, Ned Lancer”, asks Miss Pritty, standing near,He’s laughing too hard to answer, all she can hear him say is, “ear”,Ned’s flipping up and around and flipping sideways and down,Like a fish out of water, if fish could wear pink ties, and laugh like a clown,
“I'm sorry Miss Pritty”, Ned says between giggles, “I put a worm in my ear and it started to wiggle”,Miss Pritty stood firm as he squirmed, reached into her messy hair and pulled out a half-eaten pickle,She said, “Why on earth would you take a worm from the dirt and put it into your own ear, you goof?”Ned said, “At first I put it on my bald head, I thought it might feel cool and I wanted proof”,Miss Pritty chomped on her hair flavored pickle and goofed, “Worms aren't for your head, Ned; they're made for digging near roots.”Then she skipped off toward the swamp in her pretty pink boots,
Ned stood up quick, grabbed walking stick Rick, and said as he followed her pink boots sound,“Hey, Pritty girl, worms are cute when they curl”, as he bent and picked a worm up from the ground,“This one's no harm, I'll just place it on your arm”, he said and did, which caused a great sound,“Get it off”, Miss Pritty shrieked, for miles her shouting voice reached, “Get it off, get it off, or I'm going to freak!”With pink boots scrambling and messy hair rambling, Miss Pritty ran right into the creek,
Oops, Ned thought, “I'm in trouble, wow”, then he doubled over laughing, having a hysterical cow,Miss Pritty suddenly stood over him, her pretty dress dripping wet, and how,Ned took off running, after him she went gunning, yelling, “You're in big huge trouble now”,They chased to the top of the bunny hop hills, the greatest of chases, full of spills, thrills, and chills,But eventually Miss Pritty started to giggle and laugh with a snort,A cute pig sounding laugh, if ever there was a snorty sort,This made Ned laugh silly too, as though laughing were a sport,They laughed so long, laughs gathered on the ground, so they collected them, and built a laugh fort,
When they finally finished their laugh filled day,Ned walked Miss Pritty home, then walked on looking for other games to play,He wonders as he wanders along, if you've had any funny dreams,Perhaps, dreams of wormy bends and girls who are friends and things that make the girls scream,And he thinks you should seek things to laugh about, because life can be funnier than it seems.
Ned’s rolling on the floor laughing, and nobody knows why, He’s laughing so hard, laughing tears spill from his eyes,It’s a laughing fit, like when people tickle his sides,
“Why are you laughing, Ned Lancer”, asks Miss Pritty, standing near,He’s laughing too hard to answer, all she can hear him say is, “ear”,Ned’s flipping up and around and flipping sideways and down,Like a fish out of water, if fish could wear pink ties, and laugh like a clown,
“I'm sorry Miss Pritty”, Ned says between giggles, “I put a worm in my ear and it started to wiggle”,Miss Pritty stood firm as he squirmed, reached into her messy hair and pulled out a half-eaten pickle,She said, “Why on earth would you take a worm from the dirt and put it into your own ear, you goof?”Ned said, “At first I put it on my bald head, I thought it might feel cool and I wanted proof”,Miss Pritty chomped on her hair flavored pickle and goofed, “Worms aren't for your head, Ned; they're made for digging near roots.”Then she skipped off toward the swamp in her pretty pink boots,
Ned stood up quick, grabbed walking stick Rick, and said as he followed her pink boots sound,“Hey, Pritty girl, worms are cute when they curl”, as he bent and picked a worm up from the ground,“This one's no harm, I'll just place it on your arm”, he said and did, which caused a great sound,“Get it off”, Miss Pritty shrieked, for miles her shouting voice reached, “Get it off, get it off, or I'm going to freak!”With pink boots scrambling and messy hair rambling, Miss Pritty ran right into the creek,
Oops, Ned thought, “I'm in trouble, wow”, then he doubled over laughing, having a hysterical cow,Miss Pritty suddenly stood over him, her pretty dress dripping wet, and how,Ned took off running, after him she went gunning, yelling, “You're in big huge trouble now”,They chased to the top of the bunny hop hills, the greatest of chases, full of spills, thrills, and chills,But eventually Miss Pritty started to giggle and laugh with a snort,A cute pig sounding laugh, if ever there was a snorty sort,This made Ned laugh silly too, as though laughing were a sport,They laughed so long, laughs gathered on the ground, so they collected them, and built a laugh fort,
When they finally finished their laugh filled day,Ned walked Miss Pritty home, then walked on looking for other games to play,He wonders as he wanders along, if you've had any funny dreams,Perhaps, dreams of wormy bends and girls who are friends and things that make the girls scream,And he thinks you should seek things to laugh about, because life can be funnier than it seems.
NED LANCER #19
“Come in Ned Lancer”, said a nice nurse in a dress, “It’s time for another fun cancer test”,Ned didn't hear the nice nurse suggest, He was building a mish-mash magazine nest,He got bored sometimes, while waiting in the hospital lobby,And they always had plenty of magazines, so he made magazine nesting a hobby,
He'd gather the magazines and read some for learning,As the nurses walked on by with their gurneys, He'd arrange them all into a nice neat nest, and then he would absurdly, Sit on top of them and tweet like a birdie, “Excuse me, Ned,” the nice nurse covered his tweeting mouth, and said, “It’s time to come and sit on the doctor’s bed”,Ned said, “Oops, I'm sorry, I was just magazine nesting here on the ground”Then he jumped up quick to follow the nice nurse around,
Ned loved many things about the hospital, which some people thought was strange,But he loved how everything was bright and clean and perfectly arranged,He loved the doctors and nurses and more,He even loved how bright lights reflected off the shiny tile floors,
The nurses and doctors were all very nice,Sometimes they gave him his favorite ice-creams and shaved ice,And even with gruff stuff, like shots and band aid creams,They were always very gentle, so he never ever screamed,
“Hello, Ned Lancer”, greeted Nurse Sue, dressed in red,“I like your rainbow tie”, she said, as she took his blood pressure to see what it read,Fwoosh, fwoosh, fwoosh, the nurse pumped the blood pressure thingy on his arm,Ned felt it start to squeeze, but he knew it did his arm no harm,There was no need for him to feel worried or alarmed,
Sue checked his temperature and pillow fluffed, to make sure he was doing just fine,Ned Lancer loved this kind of hospital stuff, at least from time to time,He thinks he'd have fun at the hospital with you,And he wonders if you see the fun things there, and have good fun with them too.
“Come in Ned Lancer”, said a nice nurse in a dress, “It’s time for another fun cancer test”,Ned didn't hear the nice nurse suggest, He was building a mish-mash magazine nest,He got bored sometimes, while waiting in the hospital lobby,And they always had plenty of magazines, so he made magazine nesting a hobby,
He'd gather the magazines and read some for learning,As the nurses walked on by with their gurneys, He'd arrange them all into a nice neat nest, and then he would absurdly, Sit on top of them and tweet like a birdie, “Excuse me, Ned,” the nice nurse covered his tweeting mouth, and said, “It’s time to come and sit on the doctor’s bed”,Ned said, “Oops, I'm sorry, I was just magazine nesting here on the ground”Then he jumped up quick to follow the nice nurse around,
Ned loved many things about the hospital, which some people thought was strange,But he loved how everything was bright and clean and perfectly arranged,He loved the doctors and nurses and more,He even loved how bright lights reflected off the shiny tile floors,
The nurses and doctors were all very nice,Sometimes they gave him his favorite ice-creams and shaved ice,And even with gruff stuff, like shots and band aid creams,They were always very gentle, so he never ever screamed,
“Hello, Ned Lancer”, greeted Nurse Sue, dressed in red,“I like your rainbow tie”, she said, as she took his blood pressure to see what it read,Fwoosh, fwoosh, fwoosh, the nurse pumped the blood pressure thingy on his arm,Ned felt it start to squeeze, but he knew it did his arm no harm,There was no need for him to feel worried or alarmed,
Sue checked his temperature and pillow fluffed, to make sure he was doing just fine,Ned Lancer loved this kind of hospital stuff, at least from time to time,He thinks he'd have fun at the hospital with you,And he wonders if you see the fun things there, and have good fun with them too.
NED LANCER #20
Ned Lancer tied his tie, colored from his baseball batter days,With an unusual twinkle in his eyes, considering it was a Saturday,Nobody ever saw Ned, on this no matter day,But today our friend Ned felt a need to see his friends,All of them today, on one fast bike ride, from morning until days end,This was a job for his silver bike, Ben,
Off they wheeled, stopping to chit-chat with Miss Pritty, up on bunny hop hill,Singing along the way with Mr. BrBird and his BrWife Blanch, 'till he sang too shrill,Then off he pedaled, to meddle with granny Greeny, by her crick he calls a creek,He rode on with his bike, then stopped to help little tyke Mike, who's trike tire had sprung a leak,With Mike back on trike, Ned rolled on to see more friends he liked, with the wind against his cheeks,
Next stop was Mommy Wommy's house, Where Daddy Raddy was napping on the old soft couch,Ned ate some waffles with his mom, but soon it was time to move along,But suddenly his brother, Seester, showed up and pulled a giant starfish from a pouch with some tongs,“I'm going to keep this starfish in my closet”, Seester said, with a happy screech,“That starfish is really cool, but shouldn't we take it back down to its home at the beach?”Ned said that, then grabbed the starfish and ran, and was quickly out of reach,
Ned needed both hands to return the starfish, colored orange and red,So he zoomed, as fast as his legs could go at least, with the starfish on his tall bald head,His brother, Seester, had another one of his not so smart plans,But Ned was there to save the day again, even though he had cancer, he was a can-can man,He chanted, “I know I can-can, I know I can-can, I can save this starfish, because I know I can-can”,
“This is perfect”, he thought, as he neared the beaches rocky shore,“I can put Starry-starfish back home and then say hi to Shelley, in her sea shell store”,He placed Starry in its safe sea home, and then rode on to say hi, to a few friends more,He said hi to Shelley, and the old fish gutter,He said hi to the little pink haired girl, the one who sometimes cutely stuttered,Then took a long walk on the beach with his sister, who he called Princess, but her name was Butter,
It’s the end of the day, and Ned wonders if anything at the hospital made you say, hooray,Ned enjoyed his visits and play, and put his silver bike away, then he gladly had this to say,“I visited most of my fun friends today, And you're my fun friend too, so you and I will always play,I'm Ned Lancer and I'm just like you,I have cancer but I can be happy too”.
Ned Lancer tied his tie, colored from his baseball batter days,With an unusual twinkle in his eyes, considering it was a Saturday,Nobody ever saw Ned, on this no matter day,But today our friend Ned felt a need to see his friends,All of them today, on one fast bike ride, from morning until days end,This was a job for his silver bike, Ben,
Off they wheeled, stopping to chit-chat with Miss Pritty, up on bunny hop hill,Singing along the way with Mr. BrBird and his BrWife Blanch, 'till he sang too shrill,Then off he pedaled, to meddle with granny Greeny, by her crick he calls a creek,He rode on with his bike, then stopped to help little tyke Mike, who's trike tire had sprung a leak,With Mike back on trike, Ned rolled on to see more friends he liked, with the wind against his cheeks,
Next stop was Mommy Wommy's house, Where Daddy Raddy was napping on the old soft couch,Ned ate some waffles with his mom, but soon it was time to move along,But suddenly his brother, Seester, showed up and pulled a giant starfish from a pouch with some tongs,“I'm going to keep this starfish in my closet”, Seester said, with a happy screech,“That starfish is really cool, but shouldn't we take it back down to its home at the beach?”Ned said that, then grabbed the starfish and ran, and was quickly out of reach,
Ned needed both hands to return the starfish, colored orange and red,So he zoomed, as fast as his legs could go at least, with the starfish on his tall bald head,His brother, Seester, had another one of his not so smart plans,But Ned was there to save the day again, even though he had cancer, he was a can-can man,He chanted, “I know I can-can, I know I can-can, I can save this starfish, because I know I can-can”,
“This is perfect”, he thought, as he neared the beaches rocky shore,“I can put Starry-starfish back home and then say hi to Shelley, in her sea shell store”,He placed Starry in its safe sea home, and then rode on to say hi, to a few friends more,He said hi to Shelley, and the old fish gutter,He said hi to the little pink haired girl, the one who sometimes cutely stuttered,Then took a long walk on the beach with his sister, who he called Princess, but her name was Butter,
It’s the end of the day, and Ned wonders if anything at the hospital made you say, hooray,Ned enjoyed his visits and play, and put his silver bike away, then he gladly had this to say,“I visited most of my fun friends today, And you're my fun friend too, so you and I will always play,I'm Ned Lancer and I'm just like you,I have cancer but I can be happy too”.
NED LANCER #21
Over the loop and through the hoop, Ned Lancer ties his bright orange tie,It’s a Sunday morning and Ned is mourning, because he told a lie,Ned tries hard to never lie you see,But he lied to his aunt, Ruth Marie,She asked him if he was feeling perfectly fine,And Ned said yes, although he knew that he was lying,
When it comes to cancer you must always tell the truth,Especially to the doctors, and even to Auntie Ruth,Because cancer can try to be cured,That is, if you tell when things feel wrong and your thoughts are honest and pure,In fact, it's always best to tell the truth, for sure, for sure, for sure,
Ned has actually been feeling a strange little pain and a funny little strain,But he doesn't want to worry, his nice aunties worrying brain,So he lied about feeling perfectly alright,But he did the right thing later, and told his Auntie Ruth the truth that very night,That he didn't think his tummy was tummy-ing quite right,
The next day Ned let the doctor check him in bed,He hadn't wanted to tell the doctor or Aunt Ruth, but he made the right choice instead,Good thing because, the funny tummy strain wasn't about cancer, the tummy thing was, Ned swallowed too much of Crocodile's kitty-cat fuzz,
Now that Ned is feeling much better,He sat down to write you this cancer friend letter,
We should always tell the truth when we don't feel quite right, Because we have cancer, we must always fight, To let the doctors know which way to go, under our truthful guiding light, We must tell the truth to our moms and dads, and our uncles and aunts, Because only we know our bodies the best, under our own dresses or pants, So then the doctors can fix us up just right, The truth will work for us every day, and make for our better nights.
Over the loop and through the hoop, Ned Lancer ties his bright orange tie,It’s a Sunday morning and Ned is mourning, because he told a lie,Ned tries hard to never lie you see,But he lied to his aunt, Ruth Marie,She asked him if he was feeling perfectly fine,And Ned said yes, although he knew that he was lying,
When it comes to cancer you must always tell the truth,Especially to the doctors, and even to Auntie Ruth,Because cancer can try to be cured,That is, if you tell when things feel wrong and your thoughts are honest and pure,In fact, it's always best to tell the truth, for sure, for sure, for sure,
Ned has actually been feeling a strange little pain and a funny little strain,But he doesn't want to worry, his nice aunties worrying brain,So he lied about feeling perfectly alright,But he did the right thing later, and told his Auntie Ruth the truth that very night,That he didn't think his tummy was tummy-ing quite right,
The next day Ned let the doctor check him in bed,He hadn't wanted to tell the doctor or Aunt Ruth, but he made the right choice instead,Good thing because, the funny tummy strain wasn't about cancer, the tummy thing was, Ned swallowed too much of Crocodile's kitty-cat fuzz,
Now that Ned is feeling much better,He sat down to write you this cancer friend letter,
We should always tell the truth when we don't feel quite right, Because we have cancer, we must always fight, To let the doctors know which way to go, under our truthful guiding light, We must tell the truth to our moms and dads, and our uncles and aunts, Because only we know our bodies the best, under our own dresses or pants, So then the doctors can fix us up just right, The truth will work for us every day, and make for our better nights.
NED LANCER #22
Another Monday chemotherapy day,The good juice goes in, to chase the bad cancer away,It was off to the ol’ cancer center, and ol' Ned Lancer was on his way,
Ned can understand why his cancer friends don't like needles and stuff,He wants you to know, that you really should want to go, without a huff,Because chemo juices are the best at chasing the cancer away until it’s had enough,The juice goes in to find the cancer, and then that smooth juice gets rough,
The good juice that the infusion shoots in,Sprays the cancer like a hose, and then the good juice grins,Because when your body gets enough good juice, the good juice fights to win,
“Why do you go to the cancer center?” Ned was asked,“To get the good juice in”, Ned replied, “so later, when I ride Ben, I can ride real fast”,“What's good juice, and who is Ben?” asked another one of Ned's fun friends,“The good juice is chemotherapy,
And it makes cancer very scared of me, and Ben is my silver bike, Riding him is one of the many things I like”,
After stating that, Ned rode on home,As he rode, his green tie flapped against his bald-headed dome,Ned loved the way his bald head felt and so did his mother, He thought his awesome bald head felt as smooth as baby butter,At first his bald head did feel a little funny,But he always loved the way it looked, sort of handsomely stunning,Miss Pritty said, Ned’s bald head, looked cuter than her bunny,
As Ned lays in bed tonight,He hopes that you're telling the truth, when you don't feel quite right,But mostly, he hopes that you'll dream with him just right,He thinks it would be great, if you all dreamed of putting on skates,And skating with him by the beach,Playing, follow the leader, as the blue wave’s crash, and the sunset clouds are peach.
Another Monday chemotherapy day,The good juice goes in, to chase the bad cancer away,It was off to the ol’ cancer center, and ol' Ned Lancer was on his way,
Ned can understand why his cancer friends don't like needles and stuff,He wants you to know, that you really should want to go, without a huff,Because chemo juices are the best at chasing the cancer away until it’s had enough,The juice goes in to find the cancer, and then that smooth juice gets rough,
The good juice that the infusion shoots in,Sprays the cancer like a hose, and then the good juice grins,Because when your body gets enough good juice, the good juice fights to win,
“Why do you go to the cancer center?” Ned was asked,“To get the good juice in”, Ned replied, “so later, when I ride Ben, I can ride real fast”,“What's good juice, and who is Ben?” asked another one of Ned's fun friends,“The good juice is chemotherapy,
And it makes cancer very scared of me, and Ben is my silver bike, Riding him is one of the many things I like”,
After stating that, Ned rode on home,As he rode, his green tie flapped against his bald-headed dome,Ned loved the way his bald head felt and so did his mother, He thought his awesome bald head felt as smooth as baby butter,At first his bald head did feel a little funny,But he always loved the way it looked, sort of handsomely stunning,Miss Pritty said, Ned’s bald head, looked cuter than her bunny,
As Ned lays in bed tonight,He hopes that you're telling the truth, when you don't feel quite right,But mostly, he hopes that you'll dream with him just right,He thinks it would be great, if you all dreamed of putting on skates,And skating with him by the beach,Playing, follow the leader, as the blue wave’s crash, and the sunset clouds are peach.
NED LANCER #23
Sitting alone on his big round bed,Our friend, Ned, is using lots of pen ink, color red,He’s writing on this Thursday, he just loves to write and think,He sits in deep thought, chewing on his wide tie of pink,
You know Ned loves to write poems, and today he wrote two or three,One about bees, who fly with the monkeys when they swing from trees,One about knees, that got too muddy when feeding Miss Pritty’s bunny some leaves,Then he wrote another poem, this one he wrote upon his sleeve,It read, “My name is Ned Lancer, and I have cancer, but, but, but, you know what?That means only me and my cancer friends, can do the cancer strut”,
The cancer strut is a fun walk Ned made up, that only you and he can feel inside,You start by standing and making two fists, then hold them to your sides,And then you hold your chin up high, to show your cancer pride,Now reach both fists behind your back, and walk with a real cool stride,You and Ned can proudly do the cancer strut, because you like to enjoy the ride,
Ned jumped up from his bed and started to cancer strut,It always made him feel better, if he was sad or in a rut,He didn't care if he looked like a big nut,In fact, sometimes he'd add a twist, like clapping his fists open and shut,Or swinging his hips and shaking his butt,He strutted his funky cancer stuff, until he had almost and then just enough,
It’s time for lunch, so Ned slurps his soup with a cracker crunch,The crumbs on his pink tie, gather in a cracker bunch,As he eats, he wonders if your dream last night was great,And if you dreamed with him about roller skates,
Ned has so much fun strutting with cancer,He thinks you should make up some fun cancer stuff, like maybe a dance, or,How about designing some cancer pants, or,Anything that's fun, just give cancer fun a chance, or four.
Sitting alone on his big round bed,Our friend, Ned, is using lots of pen ink, color red,He’s writing on this Thursday, he just loves to write and think,He sits in deep thought, chewing on his wide tie of pink,
You know Ned loves to write poems, and today he wrote two or three,One about bees, who fly with the monkeys when they swing from trees,One about knees, that got too muddy when feeding Miss Pritty’s bunny some leaves,Then he wrote another poem, this one he wrote upon his sleeve,It read, “My name is Ned Lancer, and I have cancer, but, but, but, you know what?That means only me and my cancer friends, can do the cancer strut”,
The cancer strut is a fun walk Ned made up, that only you and he can feel inside,You start by standing and making two fists, then hold them to your sides,And then you hold your chin up high, to show your cancer pride,Now reach both fists behind your back, and walk with a real cool stride,You and Ned can proudly do the cancer strut, because you like to enjoy the ride,
Ned jumped up from his bed and started to cancer strut,It always made him feel better, if he was sad or in a rut,He didn't care if he looked like a big nut,In fact, sometimes he'd add a twist, like clapping his fists open and shut,Or swinging his hips and shaking his butt,He strutted his funky cancer stuff, until he had almost and then just enough,
It’s time for lunch, so Ned slurps his soup with a cracker crunch,The crumbs on his pink tie, gather in a cracker bunch,As he eats, he wonders if your dream last night was great,And if you dreamed with him about roller skates,
Ned has so much fun strutting with cancer,He thinks you should make up some fun cancer stuff, like maybe a dance, or,How about designing some cancer pants, or,Anything that's fun, just give cancer fun a chance, or four.
NED LANCER #24
Ned is back down at the beach again today,But this time, only in his imagination, and that's okay,It's a game he likes to play, when he's doing hospital stuff,If he's wondering and worrying too much, he'll just stop and say I've had enough,
Then he'll take slow deep breaths and go to his happy place,A happy place, is a place in your memory, that gives you a happy face,Ned has many happy to places to go, happy places indeed,He'll choose, depending on his mood and which daydream that he needs,
On this Monday, Ned is playing with his thin green tie,While waiting for the keen doctor test guy,He’s taking deep breaths and going for a trip when he closes his eyes,A day at the beach, where the seagulls screech and the dolphins swim just out of reach,
A few more deep breaths and soon Ned forgets about the doctor tests,He’s splashing in the waves, even though he sits at rest,He’s running with his friends, even though he’s in a chair,It doesn't matter that tests aren’t much fair; Ned's happy places will always be there,
Sometimes, his happy place is playing in his room,His favorite happy place, however, is high up in a hot air balloon,He flies over and around his great home town,Pointing and laughing and floating all around,
He stays in his happy place for fun, until the boring tests are done,This way tests are never too bad, and they’re often sort of fun,Ned thinks you should give, deep-breath-day-dreaming a try,He also thinks you'd like the color of today's second frog green tie,
This is the final Ned Lancer poem of this series,He’ll miss you until you read him again, and he wants this said very clearly,“I’m your good friend Ned, we’re not defeated by cancer, we’re inspired by it instead,We’re special because we have the big C,Nobody’s braver than you and me,I’m sticking my fist out for you to bump—POW!We’ll get over this backwards illness hump, like a moon jumping over the cow,Just make sure you keep tying well, those crazy backless gowns.
Contact Sean by Email at: sean@seanpresleywrites.com © Copyright 2017 Sean Presley - All Rights Reserved
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