Letter to Kids With Cancer

I’m not a doctor or a nurse, and I’m not a young person like you are. I had cancer as an adult. But I did have a serious cancer and I was younger than most people who get our disease. I also had a friend named Michael when I was young, and he had cancer, so I remember what it was like for him at that age. I went through many of the same treatments and things that all of us patients go through; chemotherapy, radiation, surgeries, etc., so I think I can help make your cancer treatments easier by sharing what I’ve learned, with you, my cancer family and friends.

I know my name looks like the word “seen”, but it’s pronounced “shon”. I think cancer is just like my name in that way; it seems like one thing, but it’s actually different than most people think. What I mean is, I thought that cancer was an evil thing and that nobody could help me. But I’ve learned that cancer is simply a word for a disease that some people get. Although cancer can make us worry sometimes, a lot of smart people want to help, and they know how to help, so we should feel great about our chances of getting better.

1 Cancer

The word cancer can be scary for people who don’t understand it. To me, cancer is just a word that was made up to describe our illness and the doctors and nurses know how to treat it, so the word isn’t really scary at all. When I can, I try to explain cancer to people who don’t understand, because I think it makes us all feel better to know that cancer isn’t some kind of monster, it’s just a difficult illness that can be treated.

2 Treatments

Of course, we’re the ones who have to go through the treatments at the hospital and the doctor visits, so we need the most bravery, and that’s okay. I figure, maybe we all have a time when we need to be brave, and for those of us with cancer, now is our time. I know that everybody, even adults, get concerned while they’re sick. It’s not fun when your body needs help with a problem. I sure was concerned and worried when I first started my cancer treatments, but I found out that it was actually empowering to be brave. When I had difficult treatments or hard days, I’d tell myself, “this is your turn to be brave, Sean”, and I’d try my best to smile through the hard parts and show cancer that I could beat it and be the winner of every day. All of my family and friends were impressed and proud of the way I fought through my treatments, and that made me even stronger and more ready to be brave the next time. It feels great to be brave and you’ll feel proud of yourself when you are.

3 It’s Okay To Feel Sad

When I had cancer, I was brave when I needed to be, but I admit that I had sad and rough days too. Even though I was an adult when I had it, cancer made me sad enough to cry. And you know what? That’s okay. Some people need to cry when they feel bad. It helps to go ahead and cry it out for a while sometimes. It’s actually perfectly normal to cry about cancer, but I, myself, was embarrassed to cry in front of other people, even though they understood my reasons. So what I did was this: I let myself cry every time nobody else was nearby, that way I could get rid of my sad tears when nobody could see me. This made it much easier to keep from crying when other people were around. The nice thing is, everybody understands that cancer patients have sad days, so they all understand when we do cry, in front of others or not.

4 Try To Have A Good Attitude

During my first few visits to the doctors and hospitals, I was angry and sad and negative and my bad attitude made the visits worse than they should have been. Then one day, I decided to make the best of it and I started being more friendly and positive and I tried to have fun. I know it sounds goofy to say you should have fun at the hospital, but I did have some fun once I started trying. The doctors even say that having a positive attitude will truly help our bodies heal and feel better. I think they’re right and it helped me when I stopped having a bad attitude. I’d say things to myself, like, “I have cancer and that’s okay, I’ll still enjoy this beautiful day”.

5 Doctors and Nurses

I think that all doctors and nurses are amazing helpers. Once I saw for myself how hard they worked to help us feel better and heard how smart and nice and good they are, I put all of my trust in them. I did exactly what they said to do and I’m happy that I did, because they all went to medical schools and have been practicing, so they really know what they’re talking about.

6 Family and Friends

I think we all know that our moms, dads, grandmas, grandpas, family and friends, get sad when we feel sick. And we feel sick at times during our treatments, so they feel bad for us. It’s not our fault that we’re sick, so we shouldn’t feel guilty about it and it’s okay if we need help and sometimes get extra attention. Even though I was the sick one, I tried to help them out by letting them know when I was feeling my best each day, which made them happier. They know we’re still the same people we were before we had to deal with getting rid of cancer, so they don’t pity us and try to help us because they think less of us. They help because they want to. Our family and friends love us the most, so we should embrace their kind help during these challenging times.

7 Losing Hair and Looking Different

Some patients lose their hair because of certain treatments, and most of us lose weight. These, and other things, make us look different for a while. We’re still the same normal guys and girls we were before, but we do look different, so it’s natural that other people will wonder why we look too thin, or why we have baldheads now. I was worried that looking different would be embarrassing, but I found out that telling people the reasons why was the most important thing. Once others know that our cancer treatments are the reason for our new appearance, they always understand how brave we are, so we’ll never have any need to be embarrassed about the way we look. I also remember how I reacted when my young friend Michael had cancer. He was bald and sometimes he wore a wig of hair, because he felt bad about his new appearance. We had just become friends, so I was worried about him because I didn’t understand why his hair had fallen out. But the neat thing was, once he told me that cancer treatments were the reason, I found out about cancer and I understood and everything was okay and normal. We played together all the time after that. I thought his smooth head looked cool when we went swimming.

8 Eating While Sick

Our stomachs become sensitive during chemotherapy and some other treatments, so I’m sure you’ve been told to eat and drink certain things that will help your tummy. My mom says I’m a picky eater, and she’s right, so I was not happy about the new and different foods and drinks I needed to eat. But I actually thought some of the new stuff tasted great, so it wasn’t so bad. I hope you like it too, but if not, I’m sure you know that it’s another part of your recovery that takes just a few seconds of bravery, so I’m guessing you’ll handle it well. And, picky or not, I always like the popsicles at the hospital.

9 Getting Shots

10 The Hospital

I admit that I was afraid to go to the hospital at first. But the more times I went there, the better I understood that everything at the hospital, including all the doctors and nurses, were put there to help us feel better. All of the equipment there is invented for us. I always try to have fun, even at the hospital, so sometimes I like to pretend I’m a racecar that was just in a crash during an important race and the hospital is where the repair machines and tools are kept. I think of my legs and arms as the wheels, my stomach and chest area is my engine, my back is my hood, and my head is the steering wheel. The doctors and nurses are the mechanics that will work on me and get me running again. I know that’s kind of silly, but I say that anybody who has cancer should be as silly as they want to be, as long as they’re behaving nicely. Anyhow, my point is, the hospital can be fun if you want it to be.

11 The Hospital Bed

I wonder if you’ve been in a hospital bed yet. I was in one for a few weeks, and surprisingly to me, I thought it was pretty cool. I did have one problem though; I’m tall, so my feet would touch up against the metal bar at the end of the bed. Lucky for me, a nice nurse would put a towel there, so my feet wouldn’t be up against the cold metal and freeze toes-like carrots in an ice-chest. Besides that, it was comfortable and I had fun pushing the button that would raise and lower my head position. I know, I know, we don’t feel very well, and that’s why we’re in those crazy beds in the first place. But I thought the bed was cozy, and it moved around, so it was a little bit awesome. I also knew that there were much worse places to lie around all day. I made this short list of some much worse places to lie than a hospital bed: 1) A bathtub full of worms. 2) A kitty litter box. 3) A pile of sharp rocks. 4) On top of a porcupine. 5) In a puddle of pancake syrup. Well, that last one would be sticky, but very tasty.

12 Don’t Be Embarrassed By Cancer

We try our hardest to get rid of the cancer that’s in us, and everybody knows it’s definitely not our faults that we have it, so I think that we should stand proud and not feel embarrassed while we have it. I figure that we’re the special ones who are strong enough to accept our fight against this illness, so we should keep our heads high, and be proud of our ability to stay positive and have fun, even during our sickest days.

13 It’s Okay to Feel Happy

I know, I know, I already said it was okay to feel sad, well, it’s also okay to feel very happy, which is obviously much more fun. Even though I felt plenty sick during my time with cancer, there were also many times when I felt so good about my progress that I just wanted to sing! So I thought up this cancer patient song. Perhaps you’d like to sing along? Here’s the mini-song I wrote for us:

~ Yes, I have cancer, but I’m still fine,

I feel good, but not all the time,

And that’s alright,

And I’m okay,

Hey cancer, you’ll be gone someday,

~ Yes, I have cancer, but I’m still good,

I’ll take my treatments like I should,

And that’s okay,

And I’m all right,

My happy spirit’s shining bright.

14 My Final Three Words of Advice

Be the boss! A boss is the person in charge of a situation. Your situation, for now, is cancer. I say you can and should be the boss of cancer. Just because cancer makes us feel all kinds of bad, weird, and funky, does not mean it controls how we feel overall. We are the boss’ of our bodies, and cancer is in our bodies, so we are the boss ̶ of cancer, too. Once I decided that I was the boss, I was able to be more positive and have more fun. I would tell myself to feel up, up, and away, like a hot-air balloon and I showed cancer that it couldn’t bring me down.

Thank you for listening to my advice and suggestions. It makes me very happy and proud to know that you’re trying hard and having fun, even though you are going through cancer treatments like I did. I fought hard against my cancer and I hope you do too. I’ll be thinking about you and wishing for you to get well soon. Good luck and good healing to you.

You're Cancer Friend, Sean